Early Thanksgiving Morning.  Not even the sun is up;  but I can hear cars outside, bringing families together.  I should be getting the turkey in the oven, but I had to pause a minute, and search my heart for the words of gratitude I need to say.


Sometimes it’s hard to feel grateful on a hard year; but that’s usually when it is most important.  The pilgrims, our early examples of thanksgiving, were also our early examples of finding things to be grateful for on a hard year.  They had lost more than half of their starting company- and  camping in the new world was hard and harsh– but they had made new friends and a new beginning, and had truly felt the hand of the Lord supporting them. And they were profoundly grateful.

The storms of life have been my lot too, this year.  But just like the pilgrims,  I too have made new friends; even a few moms just like me from far away, thru the gift of technology shrinking our world to bring people closer together.  I have a wonderful extended family, and there again I am grateful for tech that helps us stay close even when we live far apart.

And I too have felt the Lord’s hand supporting me and my family.  He has not taken away any trial, and someday we will all have the perspective to understand and be grateful for that.  But at the moment, I am satisfied that he has lifted me thru.  I can see the growth of strength of my awesome Hubby as he learns to climb over his own Aspie walls and be incredibly valiant and caring- hugging me in my needs.  I have been blessed with awesome kids, and I can see them reach, trying for the daily wins.

I can see in me, a huge reserve of  “been there-done that” that I can share with others in their needs – people like young family members just starting out and hitting their heads full-face-on to the mountain trail called special needs.  Something deep in me finds true fulfillment in being able to help- maybe that’s a part of us all, I don’t know- but it is me for sure.

And along the way, no matter the health I am in, or the state of my struggles,  I still have been blessed with the strength to carry my kids when they are in pain. (o.k.- my big boys I just hug-tho I could catch a fall if needed)   I still can think well enough to help them with their homework.  It got foggy for a bit with depression, but things are clearing- and I can research Autism journals again;  and keep learning math for which, as the kids move into high school and college stages, I am very grateful 🙂  I can still stay calm during most meltdowns.  There are many things I feel horribly overwhelmed about, but I have somehow managed to keep everyone taxied to all the directions they need to go, and have only forgotten a couple of doctor appointments.  And my faith has grown that Heaven will help me get thru the other parts.

Well, the sun is up now, and so are my kids.  And yes- even tho I may not manage more than a turkey today and maybe some treats;  still– It’s a good morning, and I am profoundly grateful.


Categories: LDS Mom of Autism, Midnight musings | Leave a comment

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